| Posted by My Super Nanny
She is a Super Mum to little Ever Lane. The founder of “The Single Mum Diaries” which evolved after Leila was left jobless, without a licence, a home and nor a partner. She was about to become a single mum. She needed support, and so she became exactly that - The Single Mum Diaries is a hub of support single mums worldwide. A truly inspiring single mama. Thank you, Leila.
You’re Mum to?
Ever Lane who is 8 months old and already trying to walk, talk and eat everything in sight. My hands are full that’s for sure.
Being a single mum can’t be easy. What has been the most challenging part thus far?
I think letting go of that picture in your head of “how its supposed to be” and letting go of the fact that you wont have that family life that you thought you would. The emotions that go with all of that and the resentment that you can feel after finding yourself as a single mother can be a really hard and bitter pill to swallow. The rest of it comes with learning just like any motherhood journey but the emotions are still something I struggle with daily.
Is motherhood what you envisioned it to be?
Motherhood was never something I really thought too much about to be honest but I certainly find myself feeling shocked a hell of a lot. I have many what the hell moments. Motherhood is definitely the hardest gig in the world because essentially we are still raising and finding out about ourselves so doing that all the while trying to parent is a hard gig, especially when you go through somewhat of a rebirth when you become a mother.
You are the wonder woman behind the blog “The Single Mum Diaries” . Can you tell us what your blog is about?
I began The Single Mum Diaries after my partner walked out on me pregnant and I went looking through the internet for a single mother out there that was really slaying mama life. When I couldn’t find it I decided to become it. I spend my days writing blogs, replying to women from all over the world that need me and collaborating with amazing companies that I feel resonate with what we are all about. It’s been a wild ride and a really unexpected one – I still find myself pinching myself when amazing opportunities come knocking – I am very blessed with how this has all unfolded and how women have received me.
What is your main message that you want to give other single mums out there?
The main message that I find myself constantly repeating is that you need to get busy making yourself whole, building yourself up and focus on being the very best mother and version of yourself that you can be – The process of becoming a single mother is a beautiful journey because its full of life lessons that break you down yet open you up to be better than you were before. Its not an easy road to walk but it’s the road that offers the most growth and if we aren’t growing and evolving into better and more knowing people then what are we really here for right. So many women write in that are stuck and it’s my role to open them up and see the beautiful possibilities that surround them. A Single mother doesn’t have to mean a struggling mother, it doesn’t have to mean that you are alone and that you are “less than” it can mean the exact opposite to that but it’s all about how you accept your fate.
Describe yourself as a mum in three words.
Chilled, focused, loving
What is your present state of mind?
Lately mum life is hard so I am feeling a little frazzled to be honest. Ever is at a very clingy stage and she cries the moment I am out of sight. It’s really testing on my patience because I have always been a person that retreats to recharge, I really thrive off spending time alone. So to have her following me around the house clawing at my legs, screaming. It is really hard for me to come to terms with. But mothering is all about adjustment and the mantra “this too shall pass” Despite it all I am happy and content with how I am in my life at the moment – And grateful. Always grateful for the journey and where I am at.
We get that parenting doesn’t always go to plan; some recover with a cuppa, some with a vino. What’s your motto when things haven’t quite panned out?
I just keep saying this too shall pass – And it does. It always does. I said to my girlfriend the other week “She’s just giving me a hard time.” And my girlfriend replied “No, she’s not giving you a hard time babe, she’s having a hard time” – So despite the fact that it hurt a little to hear that it was very truthful and I have found myself remembering those words on the hard days. I don’t drink coffee and I rarely drink alcohol but my vice is chocolate – sneaky chocolate and Netflix after putting Ever down.
If you could teleport anywhere for 24 hours, where would you go?
The Maldives… I need me some Maldives as a mamacation.
Favourite quality in a woman?
I think women need to be strong, self confident and brave. My favourite quality in a woman above all of that though is to be authentic. With social media, the world, society’s views etc. we are always being pushed or swayed a certain way – Authenticity speaks volumes and can carry you through life better than any other quality.
Your perfume is?
I wear CK the one – It’s my favourite. I also love Lady Million – both very sensual and beautiful fragrances.
What is your best beauty tip?
Take care of your skin with organic or quality products where ever you can, invest in it, look after it, cherish it. I absolutely adore dermafrac, which I get at the XY Skin Clinics – They have changed my life and my skin has never looked better, I invest in my eyebrows (most of the time) sometimes mama life gets in the way. And I love getting my eyelashes done from Eyeadore beauty. Those three tips will keep your skin looking amazing.